Across the Miles
Building long-distance family relationships.
Whether by camel, wagon or rental truck, couples have been packing up and heading into the great unknown of God’s will for thousands of years, leaving family behind with tearful goodbyes.
Although the demands of life often call us to move places far from our relatives, we are still the people closest to their hearts. We may be separated by hundreds or thousands of miles, but we can still become ministers of God’s grace in our relatives’ lives.
Call me
German sisters Heidrun and Hella have rarely seen each other since Heidrun immigrated to America with her husband in 1979. The sisters call each other at least once a month and e-mail several times a week. Hella regularly sends photos of her growing toddler and lets her daughter talk to Tante Heidrun on the phone so they can build a relationship. After all these years, consistent communication has kept them close, and Heidrun’s attitude of joy in the Lord has drawn her younger sister closer to Him.
Regular phone calls don’t have to be important or even spiritual to be a blessing. I called my dad the other day to tell him I’d used a lawn mower for the first time in my life. That small accomplishment made me think of him, and we laughed about it.
Julie, a homemaker in Dallas, says what really matters in her long-distance relationships is not talk but actions. Her parents are emigrants from Russia who live in Ohio. They struggle to understand how God can exist in a world that has been harsh to them. Julie and her husband, Marc, are open with their beliefs about God and the Bible, and they ask questions to stimulate conversation without condemning or condescending.
When her parents visit every three months, they observe mercy and forgiveness in the discipline of their three grandchildren — traits that Julie says are foreign to her parents. They notice Julie’s and Marc’s accountability and obedience to God and the positive results — honesty, integrity and joy. For her parents, actions speak louder than Julie’s words could.
Reach out and touch someone
Technology, of course, can be a valuable tool for families. Jordana, a missionary in Sweden, e-mails digital photo albums to all her friends and family in the States, showing them her new friends, her travels and her ministry.
An online scrapbook, Web site or blog can give family members something to run to when they can’t run to you. A blog is especially ideal for keeping in touch. Interactive, visual and fun, a blog allows you to easily update all your relatives. Plus they can add comments to your site.
Mail also remains a convenient way of sending a personal touch. An old-fashioned care package with goodies to smell, taste and touch still has its special place. Shay, whose newlywed daughter and son-in-law live more than 1,000 miles away, sends books, magazines, sermons on CD and their favorite chocolates.
Content despite distance
To be a blessing, focus on your blessings. Praise God boldly and heartily for where you are rather than thinking about how much you miss where you were.
When you’re feeling low, run to God before you run to anyone else. Not only will contentment and thanksgiving lift your spirit, but your family members will also catch a glimpse of God’s power in your life. Rejoice in the Lord genuinely, and those in your life will be uplifted and inspired.
Though separation from our loved ones may bring temporary sadness and longing, we can still build relationships across the miles. With a bit of dedication and personal investment, the distance won’t seem so great.