Michael W. Smith's First Priority

"Above all else, I want to be remembered as a God-fearing man who loved his wife and kids well," multiple-Grammy-award winner Michael W. Smith says. For him, being a godly father means setting priorities, modeling faith-based purpose and imparting grace-filled security to his five children, ages 16 to 25.

What matters most

Twenty-five years in the music industry has given Michael many opportunities to model his faith to fans all over the world. Even though his music and ministry play an important part in his life, Michael, who is now 51, sees his roles of husband and father as far more significant.

"I felt a strong calling from God to do my music and share life with people," Michael says, "but I can't tell you how many times I'd do a show, walk off the stage and get on the plane to get home at midnight. And I'd be driving carpool at 7 o'clock the next morning. For me, that's more important."

Michael's priorities have not gone unnoticed by his family. "I'm grateful to have a father who knew — and knows — that family is more important than a career," Michael's adult daughter Whitney says. "In the Smith home, it was hard to feel unloved."

"He tries hard to keep it all in perspective," Michael's wife, Debbie, says. "God first, family next, work/church/friends close behind. He really has to listen to the Lord or he would no doubt neglect his family or burn out completely."

Reflecting the Father

Michael has also worked hard to pass on his faith to his children. "I tried to let my actions do the talking," Michael says. "You can preach at them all day, but they watch your every move."

Michael's wife says she is grateful for their family's spiritual legacy. "Michael has modeled faith to our kids by simply living it before them," Debbie says. "He's never been one for pretense or legalism."

Michael tries to reflect the heavenly Father in his approach to parenting. "I think you've got to discipline your kids the way He does," he says. "There's a way to [discipline] with your words being really sweet. You don't get angry, and you do it with mercy. When you correct, correct with lots of grace and love."

Secure in Christ

Michael believes that instilling security in children is foundational to helping them embrace God's purpose for their lives.

"It's really about understanding the grace of God," Michael says. "And understanding that not only does He love us but He also likes us. He's fond of us. When you're secure and know who you are, then you get out of performance mode and you want to give your life away.

"Imagine a family of kids who just give — kids on a missions trip and Dad building a Habitat [for Humanity] house; Mom fixing food for the new people moving in next door. I can't imagine family life being any better than that," Michael says.

"It's not about the little spats that you have; it's about serving one another. And [when] there's grace in the moments and in the journey — then you can walk through a lot together."

For Michael, that's fathering well.